A heat butting acrobat.
I'm in that state where I'm not quite asleep, but not even remotely awake. I don't feel my hair being pulled as usual, but I do feel a soft-skinned, sweet-smelling, entirely too happy 20 pound mass on my face. This tiny little person I've created is laying on my face, only after he tried to flip over my body.
Is that how base jumping occurred? One night or early morning a child had the wild idea to flip off a queen-sized bed for the thrill of living.
I don't even speak.
I just hang on to his body, on my face, so that he does not injure himself the next time he attempts to imitate Tom Petty by free falling.
Just before, or maybe after, I'm not quite sure since I wasn't quite awake, I felt his soft hair against mine. I felt his hair against mine with each BANG as he hits his head to mine at least three times in a row.
Like who does that? As if ravaging my bosom at all hours of the night isn't enough.
He takes a break from hitting his head against mine and his entire body on my face to raise up and fall back down, face first, on my boobs. This kid puts even the professional motor-boaters to shame.
I close my eyes. Maybe if he's sucking, he'll decide to go to sleep.
No suck luck.
There's the scratching on the wall. That's totally cool though, because it means he's at the head of the bed, beside me and hopefully out of harm's way.
I would be furious that this incredibly small THING is interrupting my sleep, except that I keep hearing little sounds come out of him.
"Ba ba ba."
"EE-hEE."
These sweet little laughs and mumbles wake me up the rest of the way.
I decide to get out of bed and head straight for the coffee maker. After a bowl of oatmeal, a cup of coffee, letting the dog out, saving pieces of a wipe from being devoured, finding the dog who is still outside and sitting down on the couch to binge on Scandal, my sweet little baby boy is asleep on my lap.
Until next time, my friends. Until next time.
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